King's adds engineering to undergraduate programs

At a media conference today, it was announced that the University of King’s College’s new School of Engineering will open its doors in September 2016.
“This is the beginning of a new era,” said a member of the school’s administration. “After 225 years, we finally have a program that will equip students for the current job market.”
The decision to open the engineering school was made while repairs to Alex Hall were underway.
“Insurance covered repairs this time, but now the premiums are too high,” said someone from the bursar’s office. “We hope this program will integrate students’ academics with campus maintenance and repairs.”

Wayne Hankey was very excited at the announcement.
“This is so fitting for the legacy of this school,” said Hankey. “Frankly, things here have been stale and pretentious for a while. I don’t think all that reading is that beneficial for my dears.”
Ryan Shuvera, a 1 year BJ student who hasn’t studied math since he was 15, has already applied.
“Finally, a degree that will get me a career. Studying engineering seems daunting, but I was into lego as a kid so I think it will be easy to pick up,” he said.
The university plans to advertise the engineering program to high school students as a film studies course.
A scholarship fund to attract affluent students from outside Nova Scotia is also in the works.
Editors’ note: April Fools’!